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Goodbye worry ...

I have no idea how, why, and when do I start with having anxiety.
And I realized I had this anxiety when things start going abnormal for me.

Last two days, I had this one bizarre situation that never happened to me before.
When I tried to smile, not a full smile but one tiny smile.
My left side of lips twitches.
It felt weird, uncomfortable and I am super annoyed with it.
And of course, because I am a type of person who often worries too much,
I am worried about this too.

My husband, a great guy he is. Alhamdulilah.
Helped me calm down, prayed for me, read me ayat Kursi and blew it on his hands, and spread it on my face.
He even massaged my face, and wallahi, I really love it when he did that to me.
I felt so happy, appreciated, cared for, and again, in love.
But that still doesn't stop my anxiety.

The next day, it felt better a bit.
I was laughing with my husband and saying 
"Sayang.. the twitching has stopped",
But little that I know, the twitching hasn't stopped just yet,
It becoming worst, it spread to another side of my lips.

So now, when I smile.
The twitching happens on both sides of my lips which is scary.
I googled all the causes, relation to what type of disease, and so on.
And I have concluded that I might be having these twitches because of stress and anxiety.

Alhamdulilah, Allahuakbar, Subhanallah.. I am really happy with my marriage.
My husband is a great great guy. 
He always and constantly provides me with overflowing love and care,
And I feel forever indebted to Allah for providing me him as my blessing.

However, without realizing it, I kept worrying about the future.
The uncertainty of the future.
My work contract will end in October.
What if I cannot find a new job?
What if I got pregnant?
What if I did not get pregnant?
Do we have enough to raise our children?
And the list of things that I worried goes on and on...

But today, I decided that I want to fight this.
I have a great life.
Even though I may not have as much as others, 
But I am blessed with family and a great husband.
Must I give up and just because of this tiny little "pain"?
I choose not to do that.
And I decided to fight.

I wanna change my mindset,
My living condition,
My health,
And whatever things that I deem necessary for me to improve.
Alhamdulilah,
I found a book which is so famous.

"How to stop worrying and start living"

Just a few pages of reading this alhamdulilah have started helping me a little bit
Now all that is left is for me to work on it.
My twitching and tingling feel on my face have started to reduce a little bit.
And I am better now a bit alhamdulilah.

May everything will be better soon.
I will be sharing things from the book if I have the time later.
The book was awesome so far, and I love it!

May Allah help us. 
As we are only a mere servant.
No power and owns nothing.
Dear Allah, helps us..

Love, 
EFN



 

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